The Fuck Your Penis Chronicles: September 2011

Introduction

"The Fuck Your Penis Chronicles" is a series of humorous rants that I started on Facebook using the 'Notes' feature. It first started out with me sharing emails that I receive via dating websites. Then it slowly also became and outlet in which to voice my frustrations caused by experiences I've had involving anyone with a penis. I do my best to give a play by play description of these events.

I decided to move them to a separate blog and off of Facebook so that I'm able to say more of what I want without the prying eyes of family members and co-workers; and also to make them colorful and pretty. If you enjoy bad language, angry rants and terrible puns then you might enjoy them. The older posts will look pretty bad. I'm just cutting and pasting from Facebook. I am much too lazy to reformat them all. Tough titties if you don't like it.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Fuck Your Penis Chronicles 16: Sickly Goes Shopping

Today's story takes place yesterday when I went to target

Dude as I walk into the store: "*whistle* you look real nice baby."

I of course keep walking and don't turn around. I was so good, I went right passed the clothes section and straight to the medicine aisle. While I was shopping for medicine:

Dude: "Awww, you're not feeling goodl? Or is it for someone else? Are you being sweet and buying it for your man?"

I slowly turn my head scowling: "Go away." Slowly turn head back towards merchandise.

Dude walking away: "Damn, it must be for you then huh."

The end.

The moral of the story? Do not ruin target for me by hitting on me there, especially when I feel like poo poo. I will break a bottle and cut you with it.